If for a good part of my life I thought I did not like coffee, because it associated the taste with our summer vacations travel with my parents, where before we got into the car, we took the famous dark gallon, leaving me clinging to the belly at each new curve, during our old national roads, with that mixture in the mouth and a constant nausea.
It was not until much later that I began to enjoy the coffee, to the point that it was the first thing I did when I woke up, slowly sipping a mug full of warm, black and sugar-free coffee while reading or writing in the early hours of the morning , when the rest of the house was still silent. The habit was so strong that it became one of my morning rituals. And when I travel to go to teach or to rest, the first thing I try to understand is if where I’m going to stay, there is some machine or utensil to make coffee!
Yoga has nothing to do with attachment, but the truth is that I treasured and kept for years, with much love and care, my desire for having coffee.
A few days ago I woke up super awkward, with a belly swollen, and with the sensation of not being ok, with strong stomach pains, feeling of deep nausea, without the minimum energy in the body, zero of forces for nothing more than lying down, curled up against myself. I stayed like this for hours, alone, because Jo had already gone out to surf, and when he came back he found me completely prostrate. In some heights with stronger pains and very seasickness, others i only sleep , could barely stand up. Whenever i tried to drink or eat, it was even worse, the only thing that relieved was actually lying down, and the relief was greater when i could vomit (excuse me the description!).
After having this kind of day, without almost eating or drinking, what came into my mind? The only thing I remembered asking Jo before falling asleep was, “… and tomorrow? How will it be without coffee?”
The next day I woke up feeling recovered, but it made no sense to order a cup of coffee, and I chose green tea, sipped it slowly, and slowly ate a slice of warm bread. The locals from here call what I had of “Bali belly,” for me sounded like a super digestion stop, or something like that. I spent the next day quietly, and what surprised me was that I lived without coffee, or having no will to take that mixture that I think I love so much.
I still do not know if I’m going to stop it for just a few days, or at least reducing its consumption, or maybe stop drinking it at all. Please note that I do not consider coffee to be a boogeyman, even because there are many studies confirming several benefits of the balanced consumption of this wonderful stimulant, but I must confess to you that it is interesting to put me to the test, to test myself once again, in this thing of breaking with habits that we consider impossible!
I think it is always positive that we can put ourselves to the test, not to give results to anyone but ourselves, and to observe internally how we deal with change and novelty, trying our best for the only reason indeed, that life without attachments becomes simpler, and naturally compels us to be attentive and connected to the present.
Whether it is to stop or reduce coffee consumption, to end cigarettes in your life, or to that late-night beer that always makes your stomach turn inside out, or to stop eating those fried cashews or peanuts ( or something else) that satisfies gluttony but once again makes you nauseous, or any other habit that the result is negative by being done too regularly and excessively.